This is the most hilarious and visual parenting advice for you new parents.
For the first year of our new church, the only children were our two daughters [then 2-years-old and 1 month]. We’ve since been privileged with another kid [son] but the early years were difficult for our children because they really didn’t have anyone to hang out with at church. I still remember preaching with my baby daughter on my back during the early months.
The children’s ministry has since grown immensely as we average about 70 infants and children spread between the 9.15am and 11am services [no children’s ministry at the 5pm]. Since the beginning of the year, we’ve had numerous births with more babies coming. So, I thought it would be pastorally wise to give these new and expectant parents [and blog visitors] some heartfelt parenting advice.
View these visual instructions carefully:
In all seriousness, love and nurture your children. Pray for them; teach them; enjoy them. Teach them to love the Lord with all their heart, soul, body and mind.
The days turn to weeks; weeks turn to months; months turn to years and before you know it, your little baby will be turning 10 years old like our oldest will in few months. Parenting will be one of the most significant things you will ever do in your life so don’t give your baby your shoes when their teething. 🙂
LOL. Clearing the baby’s nose is my favorite. Someday, I hope to put this educational lessons to practice.
Children are always enthusiastic about growing in life to become excellent individuals. Thus, they usually have the urge to prove their mark in which ever way they can. The only thing they require to be a champion is the support of a good parent like you. You as a parent can boost their morale to a great extent. In fact, a parent’s influence on a child is the utmost. This is the place from where I get great tips for parenting http://www.goodparenting.co.in
I tried the nose one this evening, but I couldn’t get my finger to fit…
ROFL. The lifting one is a riot.
thanks for the advice on breast-feeding the baby. every once in a while, my seven month-old goes for my man-nipple. now i know that that is wrong and will be careful when wearing A-shirts around her.
and the part about the nose-clearing… sometimes the little boogers are at the bottom of the nose, and the best way to clear it out is with a finger or fingernail.
LOL!
Love the shoe one!
Buckle up! I remember as a kid sleeping in the shelf of the back window in my families 1972 Galaxy 500 on family road trips. How did any of us make it to adulthood!
Very nice….makes the point very well!
dang. i thought i knew what i was doing until now. back to the drawing board.
Ohhhh, if I show this to my wife, she’s gonna be all, “I told you so!!”
That was a good laugh for the day….funny!!
this is exactly the advice i’ve been looking for! thanks!!!!
Wow, that was terrific. As a mother of two young children (and one in the oven), it’s great being reminded of what not to do, as it’s so easy to forget sometimes. Since it’s been almost a year and a half since I had a new baby, a little refresher course was called for. Now I can be assured that my new baby will be handled properly. I guess I’d better show this to my husband, too.
So have you read Dave Barry’s take on it?? “Babies and other Hazards of Sex; how to make a tiny person in only nine months, with tools you probably have around the home.” A very good laugh.
so i noticed they didn’t feature your signature move in the nose-clearing panel (remember that story you told about Jubilee and that cold she had when she was really little?)
fun stuff, since the pictures are not original content, could you please reference the book that this came from?
thanks
gnaut: i found this online on some site for ‘cool stuff.’ so, no idea who the originators are.
where did you get this? i hope not people get wrong ideas from this! 😛
Our baby loves our shoes! He also loves eating his own shoes. Is that wrong? I figure, if baby’s happy, let it be. Right now he’s eating headphones and an old sock.
LoL
So funny!!
=D
Hahahaha! Yeah, I saw that book at a joke shop, and thought about giving it to my in-laws when they had their first child.
Are you sure the nose one is right? I mean, just yesterday…well, nevermind.
Well the hosing off for a bath one is one I’ve done for my then preschool aged son who sat in a waist deep mud puddle for a while with a friend and painted…he thought the outside bath was quite fun though. My “babies” are now 23 and 21 and have become awesome people – sometimes I think in spite of us, LOL. Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy! They are worth every second. 🙂
uhh, PE i think your nose clearing technique is WAYYYY more traumatic.
I have a great tip for all parents and you will never never learn about this on any mainstream media –at least, not util it is exposed.
Protect your loved ones from a hidden crime.
Search online : gangstalking, covert harrassment, organized stalking
This is real and worth looking into before it happens to you and yours!
Bahahahaaa, oh my gosh no. So funny. The diaper one is too much.
These are so great … except my husband makes the threat of using the hose all the time!
My hubby always picked wrong feeding method like fourth pic. lol. :p