Eugene Cho

a deeper appreciation of my father

Yesterday was Father’s Day and like many of you, I took some time to reflect upon my relationship with my father.

There’s so much to share. One thing I am convicted of is to strive to live without regrets in the relationships of my lives. I don’t want to be on my deathbed – many years from now – with regrets over relationships that I can impact, influence, and invest – now.

Some reflections of my relationship with my father:

Love Language

I love him immensely but never took the time or never learned how to express my love for him with my words. It was usually with my achievements.

“I love you”

But last summer, I finally managed to share with him how much I loved him. It took me nearly 39 years but it’s never too late.

A deeper appreciation

While I had my gripes, complaints, and issues, you gain a deeper understanding of someone when you find yourself in a similar role. While I still question some of the decisions of my parents, I am in awe of their commitment, sacrifice, and devotion and to this day, I ask myself:

How did they do it?

Aspiring to be like him

I admire him for the way he cared for us, for my mother; I admire the way he sacrificed so much to provide for the family – first through the US Army and then at his one and only job in the US as a self-educated engineer.

During my wedding, I shared with him and our guests that if I could just grow to be half the man he was, I’d consider myself a blessed man. I stand behind those words.

Together

During my teenage years, I wanted so much to be apart from them. Now, I can’t wait for the next time to be with them. In fact, we’re trying to convince them to move to Seattle and to live either with us or close to us.

We want to be together and especially want them to be close to their grandchildren.

Fishing with my Father

My fondest memory with my father as a young boy was going fishing with him. Everything I know about fishing I learned from my father. But during my teenage years, I became too cool for my father and no longer responded to his invitations to go fishing.

I guess it’s for that reason that I try to fish as much with my father as possible. Every year,I try to take couple weeks to spend some time with my parents and to especially continue the fiery debate with my father:

“Who is a better fisherman?”

In truth, it doesn’t matter. Just to be with him is a great testament of God’s grace in our relationship.

But if I were honest, he’s the better fisherman. And here’s the video to prove it. It was stunning to see him survey the water, cast it in the perfect place, and carefully bring in this fish.

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4 Responses

  1. abbiewatters says:

    Great fish! My father was also a fisherman, and most of the pictures we have of him in his early life are of “Papa and the Fish”.

  2. tom.fullmer says:

    I am not looking forward to those teenage years, but having been there I guess I shouldn’t expect anything different with my kids.

  3. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Eugene Cho, faithHighway. faithHighway said: RT @EugeneCho: Don't wait. Live without regrets over relationships that we can Impact, Influence, and Invest – NOW. ~ http://bit.ly/8XYpQ5 […]

  4. Don Ibbitson says:

    This was a hard article to read. My father passed in July of last year and this was my First Father’s Day without him. He was a good man and father but we were not real close. My best “memory” now is the phone call from my sister who told me received Christ. He died five days later and all the earthly memories would be for nought without that!

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One Day’s Wages

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Grateful. Still reflecting on the letters that I've received from classmates and students that have come before me and after me. Never imagined all that God would have in store for me. Lots of humbling things but in the midst of them, there were literally thousands upon thousands of daily decisions and choices to be faithful. That's what matters. Seen or unseen. Noticed or unnoticed. You do your best and sometimes you stumble and fumble along but nevertheless, seeking to be faithful.

Also, you know you're getting old when your school honors you with a Distinguished Alumni Award. Lol. 47 is the new 27. Or something like that. Here's to the next 47. In our culture, we can be so obsessed with the "spectacular" or "glamorous." The Church often engagws in thia language and paradigm...but what if God has called many of us to small, ordinary things?

Will we still be faithful?
Will we still go about such things with great love and joy?

I recently came across this picture taken by @mattylew, one of our church staff...and I started tearing up: This is my mother; in her 70s; with realities of some disabilities that make it difficult for her to stand up and sit down...but here she is on her knees and prostate in prayer. She doesn't have any social media accounts, barely knows how to use her smartphone, doesn't have a platform, hasn't written a book, doesn't have any titles in our church, isn't listed as a leader or an expert or a consultant or a guru. But she simply seeks to do her best - by God's grace - to be faithful to God. She prays for hours every day inteceding for our family, our church, and the larger world.

Even if we're not noticed or celebrated or elevated...let's be faithful. Our greatest calling as followers of Christ is to be faithful. Not spectacular. Not glamorous. Not popular. Not relevant. And not even successful in the eyes of the world.

Be faithful. Amen. #notetoself (and maybe helpful for someone else)

At times, we have to say ‘NO’ to good things to say ‘YES’ to the most important things.

We can't do it all.
Pray and choose wisely.
Then invest deeply. May our compassion not just be limited to the West or to those that look like us. Lifting up the people of Iraq, Iran, and Kurdistan in prayer after the 7.3 earthquake - including the many new friends I met on a recent trip to Iraq.

The death toll rises to over 400 and over 7,000 injured in multiple cities and hundreds of villages along the Western border with Iraq.

Lord, in your mercy... We are reminded again and again...that we are Resurrection People living in a Dark Friday world.

It's been a tough, emotional, and painful week - especially as we lament the horrible tragedy of the church shootings at Sutherland Springs. In the midst of this lament, I've been carried by the hope, beauty, and promise of our baptisms last Sunday and the raw and honest testimonies of God's mercy, love, and grace.

Indeed, God is not yet done. May we take heart for Christ has overcome the world. "Without genuine relationships with the poor, we rob them of their dignity and they become mere projects. And God did not intend for anyone to become our projects." Grateful this quote from my book, Overrated, is resonating with so many folks - individuals and  NGOs. / design by @preemptivelove

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