Eugene Cho

My exclusive unboxing and first impressions of the iPhone 5!

Dear iPhone crazies, geeks, and idolaters: Calm down. Breathe in and breathe out.

On the news release of the new iPhone 5 – the answer to all of the society’s problems, how can I not share this post again? Being a recovering gadget geek and part of the “in” crowd, I occasionally get access to the latest technology and thus, I had some time to play around with the latest iPhone 5. Here it is, in all it’s glory and splendor…

I hope I don’t get sued. I’m serious.

As gadget freaks celebrate the official release of the iPhone 3G 5 today… The main reason why the iPhone sucks so bad is because I can’t get one.  As much as I want, I just can’t.  Another reason: it’s as big as my shoe and nanchucks. This post is dedicated to all you folks who want to get an iPhone 3g 5 but for various reasons, can’t and/or won’t get one.  Enjoy the pics and this post [Mac vs PC].

INTERFACE: Very clear instructions and Power button is very very visible.

USABILITY: The buttons on the TouchPad are very easy to see and push. In fact, Apple guarantees you’ll never press the wrong button.

DURABILITY: Built solid like a rock or a shoe. But smells better than your shoe.

SIZE: Yes.

FLEXIBILITY: Not only is it an iPhone, but it can also iProtect you from phone jackers. I personally like to carry around my nanchucks where ever I go and will utilize my new iPhone 3G  5 for protection as well.

Here’s what it looks like to carry both your nanchucks and new iPhone 3G 5 in your back pockets. Don’t mess me with me. I’ll kick your ass…and then, pray for you.

Seriously, I’ve had this phone for awhile. I love it. Whenever I’m having a tense day…I carry this phone outside. I’ll pretend I’m talking on this phone as I’m walking or even better, driving around…and the looks people give me. It’s hilarious.

And lastly, a friendly reminder to be careful with your nanchucks. Don’t jump and swing.

Filed under: technology, , ,

30 Responses

  1. nathan says:

    This post was awesome!

  2. ruth says:

    i enjoyed this post just as much as the first time you posted it. :)

  3. Jason says:

    this is great! that was the first ‘cellular’ phone my family had, circa 1993. i think we paid $0.30 per minute, plus a per-call connect charge. and we had to carry it in a backpack.

  4. Tyler says:

    still funny the 2nd time.

  5. joanne says:

    one of my favorite posts! bwahahahaha

  6. Jay Sellers says:

    I certainly remember being envious of people that had that Motorola phone and didn’t have to carry their phone in a bag. Our grand kids well probably laugh at our memory of having to carry a phone at all. It should be reduced to a keychain with bluetooth real soon now.

  7. kataztrophy says:

    Bait and switch….Brilliant!

  8. ashley park says:

    heheh..funny…you almost got me good!!

  9. Sandy Dobbins says:

    Eugene, Francis Chans new book Crazy Love (www.crazylovebook.com) Good Stuff for vacation.

  10. Kevin King says:

    I can’t get one either!!! Mainly because Cingular/AT&T does not have coverage in my area!!! iPhone sucks because it doesn’t work with verizon or Alltel!!!

  11. llofte says:

    HAHA. that’s funny! I got the new iPhone 3G and LOVE it =D Sorry you can’t get one!

  12. formosa92 says:

    Brilliant! I’m so jealous!

  13. Curtis says:

    Oh gosh how funny. might be useful as a bat too.

  14. cheatsisazn says:

    Cool.

  15. alliehope says:

    ‘I’ll kick your ass…then, pray for you’. Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant! That’s absolutely hilarious.

    Oh BTW: I don’t want an iPhone. I wouldn’t mind having one, but I don’t truly need one.

  16. [...] I’d like to look at iphone from a different angle. Why iphone doesn’t suck. (Thanks to eugene e cho who has made these beautiful [...]

  17. candyzhao says:

    i always can not access to internet, even if i connected , but is very very snow, i phone 3G sucks, i really wanna sue iphone, anybody wanna sue iphone with me????????

  18. [...] discussion was pretty spirited.  I also got some additional hate mail for my post entitled Why the Iphone Sucks which pretty much demonstrates my envy of iPhone users.  I never got a new laptop then but  now I [...]

  19. pchou says:

    hahaha…where do i get my hands on the iprotect?

  20. LT says:

    I love you man. I don’t have any guilt or regrets for owning an iPhone. If I didn’t have one. No sweat. But good thing Apple paid for my iPhone and not me.

  21. Val P. says:

    I’m a new fan. (I think I recognize that phone, with a different logo, lol.) Love this post and still following the comments on the “New Calvinists” post.
    Have fun!

  22. [...] favorite heroes: MLK Jr. and Frederick Douglass; Family pics;  The big king salmon; and of course, my infamous sucky iPhone.  Kinda [...]

  23. christina says:

    iphone 3g does suck the lg dare is wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy better

  24. jonathanmontan says:

    Simply awesome…i love that line about kicking ass and praying for you

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